Positive Self-Talk Can Hurt (2)

This is part two about how trying to use positive self talk doesn’t work.   Unless we change the underlying belief that feeds negative feelings it can lead to frustration and self blame.

When Sandi would get down on herself her mom would remind her of all the wonderful things she did.  She’d remind Sandi to say positive messages about herself many times a day.

Unfortunately this backfired.   It seemed the more Sandi tried to be positive the more she felt like a failure.  On top of this she became angry and depressed.  That is when she came in for help.

There are two parts that need to be worked on in order to change negative beliefs.

1. The “program” that is “running” the belief.  We go to the root where the belief was formed to re-program beliefs that hold us back.

2. The habit part – this is where positive statements are effective

The problem with just saying how wonderful you are, or that everything will be all right is that unless the belief is changed they don’t ring true.  For instance if a person has a belief that they can’t do things “right,” no matter how many statements to the contrary, the belief doesn’t change.

Therefore the place to make the change . . .      continued tomorrow.

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